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Granny Gets a Vibrator

By Vibrating Liz

  
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One beautiful sunny day in late August of last year I was diagnosed with an aggressive form of stage-IV non-Hodgkins lymphoma. CT scans showed that a primary tumor the size of a grapefruit had wrapped itself around my heart and lungs and was pressing hard against several major veins and arteries, slowly cutting off the circulation in my neck. The cancer had spread throughout my body, and the prognosis was not a pretty sight.
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By Vibrating Liz

  
A few weeks ago I moved into a house that has a fluorescent light fixture in the bathroom, and the damn thing was acting all hinky. It refused to to come on at all unless I flipped the switch five or six times, then it flickered so furiously the whole time it was on it nearly drove me to commit mass murders There's a six week wait for electricians and handy people around here, so I figured, what the heck, I'll gird my loins and fix it myself.
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By Vibrating Liz

  
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